countdown...

DISNEYWORLD, originally uploaded by ernest.borg9.

...has begun. packing has commenced. excitement at our house is at an all time high.

headed to disney world next week for ej and olivia's fifth birthdays.

say hello...

...to my latest craigslist find.  a set of fulton sign & chart marker stamps. so excited about this one and i can't wait to put it to use!  so many project ideas and so little time.  story of my life.  but, still happy just to call it mine. 

i heart spring.

farewell to my faithful friend.

dogs are such amazing creatures.  showing unconditional love and loyalty until the end.  they quickly work their way into our hearts and remain there forever.

it was so hard to let you go today.  i have peace knowing that you will no longer suffer.   but, it doesn't make it any easier to say goodbye.   i will miss you so much, my faithful friend.

Farley Baxter
6/21/1999 - 3/24/2010

 

Sad

Well, my bad morning turned into a worse day.  Gene took Farley to the vet tonight and came home with very bad news.  He has a huge tumor taking up most of what is left of his spleen.  He is bleeding internally and probably has been for several weeks.  From what little research I've done, it appears as though he has Hemangiosarcoma.

He fits the profile for this cancer.  Male, between the ages of 8-10 and a Golden Retriever.  This cancer is also very common in German Shepherds.  Unfortunately, there is nothing we can do for him except relieve him of his suffering.  Gene and I have spent most of this evening crying.  As much as Farley can be a huge pain in the arse from time to time, I can't imagine our lives without him.  Gene and I brought him home at 8 weeks old, only a few months after we were married.  He was our first baby.  He's lived in four homes with us, welcomed three babies and spent the last almost eleven years as a big part of our family.

I can't yet wrap my head around the fact that after tomorrow he will no longer be with us.  I'm so used to him following me around the house and laying at my feet. He's been so wonderful with my kids.  They're going to be sad to learn that he's not coming home.  I'm not sure yet how we're going to explain it to them.  I was hoping we'd have several years left with Farley.  This is happening all too soon and I'm not ready to say goodbye. 

Farley spent this evening sandwiched between Gene and I on the "good sofa".  Something he was never allowed to do.  He shared my Oreo cookies.  He got lots of lovin from both of us.  Gene carried him upstairs so that he could sleep in our room one last time.  He's too weak to go up on his own.  And tomorrow, we'll say goodbye to an amazing and loyal companion.  I don't know if I have the strength to be there with him but he deserves that much from me. 

Rough Morning

The trash collectors woke me up at 5:30 this morning.  Wrong night to sleep with the windows open.  I must have counted my coffee scoops incorrectly as my morning coffee tasted like water flavored with a hint of coffee and cream.  I'm on my 2nd and correctly measured pot.  I spilled Piper's oatmeal all over the floor, my leg, my new sneakers and the cabinets.  My husband forgot to put the van seat back in the van last night so I spent 20 minutes wrestling and cursing it (and him) safely back into place.  This took 10 minutes longer than I had hoped and we therefore were not able to make it to story time at the library.  Our dog, Farley, is sick and isn't eating.  I have a vet appointment scheduled for this evening and am hoping it isn't serious.  He's old. 

I was a grouchy Mama this morning.  I hate when that happens.  When it all builds up and I snap at the twins for trying to talk at the same time or asking too many questions or talking while Piper is crying and I can't hear what they're saying and can't take all of the noise and craziness at once.  My morning, in a nutshell.  Thankfully, I don't have many of them.

I apologized to EJ for being grouchy and snapping at him.  He said, "It's ok, Mommy.  I still love you." 

Thank goodness. 

Day 70

Day 70 , originally uploaded by tlheyman.

Work has finally begun on our basement. Looking forward to a finished playroom/craft room/work out room.

Piper

I had some fun with Piper and my camera the other day.  She was such a willing participant and I got some great shots of her.

Piper will be seven months in a few days.  Hard to believe. 

Stats and habits of my almost seven month old:
She's 18 lbs and at her 6 month appointment was 28 1/4 inches, which is off the charts in height.

She's been sitting independently now for a few weeks.  Sucks her thumb on a fairly regular basis (especially when she's tired and putting herself to sleep).  Is enjoying solid foods and learning to pick up food and feed herself.  The "picking up" part is going well but the "getting it into her mouth" part is proving to be a bit difficult.  She has learned to use a sippy cup.  Is over (for the most part) her stranger anxiety.  Is using consonants now while babbling (dada, mama, etc).  Taking two naps per day, is sleeping through the night again (thank goodness) and has popped through two bottom teeth.

I am one lucky Mama to have been blessed with this little girl.    

It's so very sad...

what some people have to endure in their lives.  I always struggle with this.  Why some people must suffer through the most tragic of events while others never experience such a devastating pain.

I learned yesterday from a Facebook post about a little girl who lost her fight against stage four Neuroblastoma.  I followed this post to a blog that the little girl's parents had created.  There, along with a Twitter account, the parents posted updates for the world to see.  As of last check, the Twitter account had 45,000 followers.  Wow.

I'm almost glad that I didn't find this account sooner as I know I would have begun following their Tweets and, in turn, tortured myself daily.  I can't handle this sort of thing.  And, she wasn't my child.  I can't even wrap my head around the the type of pain you experience when it is your child.  Losing one of my children, especially in this manner, is my worst fear.  And, reading posts like this scare the crap out of me.  They make me paranoid.  They make me worry.  They show me that no one is immune to this scenario and miracles don't always happen.  I haven't been able to get this little girl, or her family, out of my head since I read their story yesterday.

Rest in peace, sweet little one.  If you'd like to read their story, you can see their blog here or their Twitter account here.

signs

the snow has melted and i can finally see the grass. albeit brown. and dead. but grass nonetheless. and if you look ever so closely, there are a few blades of green in the mix. spring will be springing soon. i. can't. wait.